Real Men Go to the OB/GYN

Why should you go to the OB/GYN? You can summarize the main reason in one short sentence: Because this is your (plural) pregnancy.

Now, you may not be crazy about your partner going to a gynecologist, period. After all, there’s a perfect stranger (sometimes a man) peering and poking into her genitalia, ordering mammograms, and who knows what else!

Well, if you talk to a gynecologist outside business hours, nearly every one (regardless of whether it’s a man or a woman doctor) will tell you that any titillation there might have been in a pelvic examination is long gone by the time you leave medical school.

Looking into a “stranger’s” vagina quickly looses sexual allure when you do it 120 times a week, every week. So the first step in preparing to visit the OB/GYN with your partner is to toss fear and jealousy overboard.

Plus, as an expectant dad, you have tons of questions, no previous experience (if this is your first time), and intense desires to protect your baby and your partner.

A great antidote to that stress is information, which an OB/GYN has plenty of. Another antidote is confidence that someone is looking out for your partner. A good OB/GYN does that, too.

So there are some selfish reasons for an expectant father to develop a good working relationship with the OB/GYN. But a more important reason to do so is your partner.

Regardless of whether your partner has had a baby before (and especially if she hasn’t) she needs every ounce of moral support you can give her. Going with her to the doctor is tangible support she can see and feel.

Plus, there’s the practical benefit. It’s a little hard to keep mentally sharp when someone is examining your cervix, or hooking up medical equipment for tests. With all that going on, it’s easy for an expectant mom to forget some of the questions she wanted to ask her OB/GYN, or some important information she wanted to pass along. That’s where you come in, and why you have to go to the OB/GYN and be her ears and eyes—and advocate for her.

Adapted from The Pocket Idiot’s Guide to Being an Expectant Father. by Joe Kelly and used by permission.