Real Dads Play Dolls

Is playing with dolls manly?

That’s a question that occurs to many fathers and stepfathers of daughters. And most of us believe that real men don’t play dolls.
That belief is of little use once you have a stepdaughter or daughter. In fact, it may be a major barrier in the work of building a strong bond with her.

Girls tend develop their identity through their relationships with others. So forming and negotiating relationships is incredibly important work for your daughter. She starts that work by acting out relationships with dolls and toys.

A father (and former Marine) named Dave once told me:

I’ve jumped out of airplanes and done all kinds of difficult things. But the toughest thing I ever did as a man was flop down on the floor with my daughter when she asked, ‘Daddy, will you play dolls with me?’ I thought sure I was abandoning my masculinity and I hoped no one—not even my wife—would ever see me. But it took only a few minutes to see how much fun my daughter was having to have me playing dolls with her. The look on her face won me over completely. I was hooked, and I’ve played dolls with her whenever she asks ever since.

If he can do it, we can, too.

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