Be Your Own Kind of Dad

I think every prospective parent should watch the movie Parenthood before getting pregnant. The film could easily be called Fatherhood, since the main characters are the dads. That movie makes clear some central truths about fathering:

It is like a roller coaster.

You can’t know for sure how your actions will affect your children.

You can guarantee that your actions do affect your children.
My favorite line from Parenthood is when Keanu Reeves’ character Tod says, “You need license to buy a dog or drive a car. Hell, you even need a license to catch a fish. But they’ll let any (expletive deleted) a**hole be a father.”

Of course, by visiting this website, you already show your commitment to be and involved and effective father. But with a bit of crass humor (the kind guys like, right?), Tod explains the biggest dilemma a new father faces: No one trained me for this job. The baby doesn’t come with an operator’s manual, plug-and-play attachments, or downloadable upgrades.

Despite this, dads today have more freedom than ever to take “nontraditional” approaches to fathering. Many men take time away from their careers to stay home with the baby while their partners return to the workplace. Other men work part-time or telecommute so they can commune with baby every possible moment. Some men even teach Head Start and early childhood parent education classes!

In other words, you don’t have to father the same way as your father or grandfather did. You can be your own kind of Dad. That opportunity is liberating and exciting, but can also be disconcerting. After all, it’s harder to find examples to follow when you’re doing things in a new way.

But did you know that nature provides tools that you may not yet be conscious of?

Adapted from The Pocket Idiot’s Guide to Being an Expectant Father by Joe Kelly and used by permission.